Blog #5. How my "modern family" relates to Gloria Naylor's "The Two."

My dad and me.

            Tolerance is an interesting concept. People in civil society are expected to be tolerant in every situation, even if we have never been exposed to that situation. How is a child supposed to learn tolerance for later on in adulthood when their life experiences have limited them to seeing the “other side”? In Gloria Naylor’s short story, “The Two”, this idea is illustrated time and time again. Residents of Brewster Place have limited experience with gay individuals; consequently, from their viewpoint, Lorraine and Theresa were viewed as two sinful women, going against not only the “Good Book”, but also defying how things ought to be. Fortunately, I learned the concept of tolerance at an early age. I was able to see the growth and love in a relationship between a gay father and his daughter. How, you might ask? Well, keep reading.

            Since my formative years, I knew that my sister and I had different fathers. Growing up, my sister and I shared clothes, conveniently the same shoe size, similar tastes in music, and a mutual love for our unifying bond, our mom. Even with our nine year age difference, we would spend countless hours in the car consuming too much frozen yogurt and commiserating about how stupid boys are. We are sisters and there were never distinctions made.

Brittany's dad and our mom were married for twelve years; following their divorce, Brittany's father began to explore his sexuality and has maintained the gay lifestyle since that time. Our dads have created the two separate "worlds" in which we partake. Our fathers have similar morals and have taught us the same principles, though through different ways. The difference lies in the fact that my sister’s father’s interest lies in couture fashion and the latest style of makeup; while my dad finds solace in the outdoors and when the Stanford Cardinal pull off a win.

The part in “The Two” that struck accord with me was when Mattie and Etta were discussing Theresa and Lorraine’s relationship. Mattie’s statement is profound and represents my personal beliefs regarding people’s sexuality and the “differences” between our two fathers. “Maybe it’s not so different, Mattie said, almost to herself. Maybe that’s why some women get so riled up about it, ‘cause they know deep down it’s not so different after all.” 

Brittany and her dad.

Individuals are different and interests vary tremendously depending on the person. My dad likes women and football. Her dad likes fashion shows and men. The point I’m trying to make is that sexuality can be compared to an interest. We all have different interests, but are we lesser people if our interests vary from the “norm”?

            This aspect of my family has been a vehicle by which I have learned to be more tolerant of people and their circumstances; however, I realize that some do not have this vehicle by which they are able to experience different people and ideas. One of the short story’s antagonists, C.C. Baker, who assaulted Lorraine, clearly never experienced a vehicle in which to learn to be tolerant of others and their choices.

My tolerance of other people stretches beyond their sexual preference; I know that I am a more tolerant and accepting of people because I realize that the majority of people, like myself, have an aspect of their life that may seem "unconventional" or difference from the rest, but that makes them unique, shapes their character, and perhaps make them a more tolerant person.

Landan Rivers: Blog Option 5

In Herland by Charlotte Perkins Gilman, Van, Jeff, and Terry learn about a supposed land filled with only women. Initially, they believe that the story cannot possibly be true, that men must be hiding away somewhere. While they want to wave off the idea as a legend, ultimately human nature drives their curiosity to find out if a land of women could truly exist. Throughout their travels they hypothesize what the land will be like, coming to the conclusion that if a land of women does exist, it would be unsuccessfully run and filled with drama, unkempt land and infrastructure, and little to no education. What they find, however, is impeccably kept towns, knowledgeable women, and a societal system that strives to bring out the best in every woman.

In all, Gilman juxtaposes the idea of the American woman – and thus the idea of what a woman should be like according to Van, Jeff, and Terry – and places her against the successful, loving, hard-working, knowledgeable, and open women of Herland. Gilman conveys the idea that women are capable of being much more than homemakers and depending on men throughout their lives. This idea is successful because she didn’t use American women, but rather chose to create a utopian society that impressed the “sensible” Americans who believed that nothing could compare – much less beat – American society.  This idea is incredibly important because is challenges every ideal and expectation that is placed on women, showing them that they can go so much farther than what is often believed.

The infographic before showcases just one of the many ways women are disadvantaged in American society. I'm willing to bet that the women of Herland would be horrified to know these statistics.

In chapter 12, Van states that, “When we say men, man, manly, manhood, and all the other masculine-derivatives, we have in the background of our minds a huge vague crowded picture of the world and all its activities. . . . And when we say women, we think female—the sex. But to these women . . . the word woman called up all that big background, so far as they had gone in social development; and the word man meant to them only male—the sex.”

            The scary thing about the quote is that American society has women integrated into everyday life, and yet we still think of them as the sex, not of what they are capable of. It is logical for Herland women to see male as the sex, as men have have absolutely no contribution to the society because they don’t exist in it. As a society, we shouldn’t allow men and women to be separated so severely, but rather fight towards an equality where we can be on the same level and contribute to society equally.

            I personally give Herland a rating of 5 because of the issues that are brought up. Herland doesn’t just showcase the inequities, but rather proves how silly they are. While the logistics of Herland may be impossible, then men are opened up to the idea of a land where women are in control, in charge, and are fully successful. It shows that women are capable of being mothers and caretakers, but also workers and leaders. In all, Herland shows the strength of women by juxtaposing them on the perceived weakness of women when their strengths are subdued so men can be in a position of power.

Blog Option 3: Can Women Have It All?

            A Short History of Women by Kate Walbert is a novel ripe with the theme of feminism and seems to ask the question whether women can “have it all.” This question has been haunting me as my husband and I contemplate having a family, potentially juggling law school, as well as his career. While scouring the internet searching for a news story/political issue to correlate with the novel I came across an article written by Ann-Marie Slaughter called “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All.” Slaughter is a career woman, wife and mother who once held what she described as “a foreign policy dream job” (para. 1) in the State Department. She mentions in the article that having a job with a flexible schedule is key to having it all. Her job as a professor at Princeton offered her that flexibility so she was able to be there with her children and be at work while her children were away. She goes on to say that women like her, who hold powerful positions, are the reason “millions of women feel  that they are to blame if they cannot manage to rise up the ladder as fast as men and also have a family and an active home life (and be thin and beautiful to boot” (para. 5).

            This immediately reminded me of Caroline Townsend Barrett Deel’s chapter in A Short History of Women. Caroline is a career driven divorcee with one daughter away at college. At the end of her chapter the book describes a scene when Caroline is just coming home from work: “Her briefcase bulged on the side table; she might steal a few hours before bed. Too much to do. There was too much to do. For, what? Money? Yes, and no. It was beyond that” (Walbert, 222). It seems as Caroline reflects back on her life that she regrets working so much. She regrets divorcing her husband and not spending time with her daughter while she had the chance.

            The struggle demonstrated by Caroline in the novel and Slaughter in reality seem similar. Both are feminists that value career driven women and look down upon those who might have the audacity to choose family over the commitment to their career. It is important to note that Slaughter left her government position and went back to a tenured position at Princeton in order to be there for her husband and children. She also believes women can have it all and at the same time just not in this economy and societal structure. She mentions two remedies to the issue of feminism and having it all of which I can fully agree with. Firstly, women need to stop looking down on other women who consider family time when considering career options. Lastly, she recommends rallying behind representative female influences in the government because only women will understand the struggles their fellow women go through. Then and only then will women truly be able to have it all.

            The article is wonderfully written. If you care to read it Click here for the article.

Blog #4, Option #3

The article "Hollywood's Female Trouble" has many parallels to the book Lean In by Sheryl Sandberg. Both pieces stress the importance of women in the work place. For Gruber, it is getting more women in director positions ir lead roles, for Sandberg it is getting more women into positions of power in the business world. As stated in "Hollywood's Female Trouble", "you need an example for everybody so they can see there is an opportunity". Sandberg shares similar views, she has acted as a mentor and strong voice for millions of American women through writing her book and sharing her story. But what happens when the TV world and Sandberg's world collide for an astonishing twist? Time Magazines article "Sorry, Sheryl: Scandal Just Made an Evil Lean In Reference" does just that. The article explains how a lead female character in the hit TV show Scandal has made a negative Lean In reference. Look at the response the lead character gives when someone tries to make her turn against her boss, "Here’s the thing, Marie Wallace is a trail blazer. She’s a role model. There just aren't that many women this high up in the business and she’s the best. So am I willing to piss off a potential mentor just to help you out? I don’t think so. I’m leaning in, Harrison. Making an investment in my future. Sorry" one might see this as a positive thing, however, this character is a terrorist working for a terrorist organization.

The media has given a female character a position of power and made a mockery of Sandberg's message by using it in a position of terrorism. The American people have a long, horrible past with terrorism and when you link Sandberg's message to it, you elicit the same feelings. Here a female is given a lead role something preached in "Hollywood's Female Trouble", yet at the same time it is bashing another women's strong words of advice and reputation. Bringing one women up by tearing another women down, not every lady like in my opinion. And it is occurrences like these that seem to halter progress for women in many industries.

Times article : http://time.com/49364/scandal-lean-in-sheryl-sandberg/

Women on Top

Why aren't more women on top?

http://video.foxnews.com/v/3419916748001/why-arent-there-more-women-at-the-top-/#sp=show-clips

-Fox News Report from April 1, 2014

I found that this news report that aired on April 1, 2014 by Fox News correlated with our readings from Charlotte Perkins Gilman's novel, Herland. What I found particularly interesting was Susanne Venker's view of total equality between men and women. 

"White washing gender. Making us all the same. All doing the same things"

The women of Herland, although just being exposed to males for the first time, had the assumption that in their guests society that men and women were considered equals and were shocked to find that women were subordinate to men. 

"We do not allow our women to work. Women are loved-idolized-honored-kept in the home to care for the children." (Gilman 87)

"Tell me first, do no women work, really? (Gilman 87)

In their society, it was the expectation that everyone would contribute to society and no one job was seen as more important than another. Each person and their respective task was important to the functioning of their society and therefore each was cherished and valued equally. Together, the women worked for the good of society rather than for personal gain. 

Today, there is a major issue in the under representation of women in the work force, particularly the more knowledge based jobs. Women have made substantial gains in the past decades, but many large companies continue to be dominated by a majority of males. Susanne Venker believes that one of the main reason's for this issue is time. Not the lack of time, but the unequal division of time and how men are expected to work and women are expected to spend a majority of their time at home caring for the children.

"There's just so much time in the day and we have to work together to get it all done, and to respect each others roles and not try to one up each other" -Susanna Venker

The women of Herland valued their place in society and rejected the notion that childrearing was all that they were capable of. When the men told them of how the women are socially responsible for having and raising their own children, they were appalled. 

The important connection between this news report and Herland is the role of women in the labor force. The ideals of the women who make up Herland parallel those of the feminist today who aim for equality between men and women in the work force where the distribution is equal to 50/50. They aim to have not only equality in the work force, but also in the home where childrearing and raising is a more equal process.